time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time

Equal sign capital pee

I stole this from adj

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.” They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Got this from the red cross website.

More about AB Positive

• 3% of the population can receive your red blood cells.
• 100% of the population can receive your platelets.
• 100% of the population can receive your plasma.

You share your blood type with 3% of the population.

Your parents have one of the following blood type combinations:

• A, B
• AB, A
• AB, B
• AB, AB

The Japanese believe that your blood type is an indicator of your personality,* similar to the belief in the Signs of the Zodiac here in America. According to the superstition, people with type AB blood are cool, controlled, rational, sociable, popular, critical and indecisive. Your Rh factor does not play a role in determining your personality.

Some famous people with type AB blood are Jackie Chan, Marilyn Monroe, John F. Kennedy and Mick Jagger.

I share the same blood type with Jackie Chan!  You may call me the drunken master now.  The only reason I was looking this up is because I keep getting phone calls from the UCLA blood/platelet center asking me to donate platelets.

Wow this was done back in December of 2004.  4 years ago… time flies

How to get on National Television during a major sports event

Step 1:

Smile cuz you’re gonna paint your head

Step 2:

Shave head w/ razor

I would suggest to also “bic” it after using the clippers for the ultra smoothness

Step 3:

Choose pattern to paint

In this example I’m going for the classic two tone paint split down the middle

Apply a strip of tape down the middle of the face to ensure an even and straight paint line

Step 4:

Choose colors and Apply Paint

This is what it should look like half way through

Step 5:

Choose second color and apply to other side

Note: obviously you can’t use the tape method. Please take your time, the paint can and will mix if you don’t do it correctly.

Step 6:

It may be handy to have a friend around to get those hard to reach places

Step 7:

Smile cuz you’re done and you can’t touch your face for the rest of the night

Step 8:

Get on National Tv

Click here to see

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Because she (EDIT) they buys me furniture! Thanks cindy (EDIT) and todd!!!! After three hours and a sore back it looks awesome!

I have a confession to make….

I’m not a registered voter =\

This is my third presidential election and I still have never cast a single vote.  I guess the last two I just really didn’t care that much.  But I’m older now and a lot more aware of what’s going on around me and actually care.  I really want to vote on the California propositions (especially prop VOTE NO.  Anyways I’m not allowed to give my opinions cuz i’m not even voting.  I guess the only positive is that I don’t have to wait in long lines at polling places on Nov. 4.

So to add insult to injury….. I found out that my local polling place is IN my Condo complex in the recreation room.  That’s like… RIGHT NEXT TO MY BUILIDING.  It’s not even across  street.. it’s across the walking path!  I’m so going to register so this won’t happen again.

My coworker had a Kobe sighting today. Actually seeing Lakers around this area isn’t all that uncommon. I pulled up next to Devean George once. He was in his baller black mercedes. Rolled down the window to say hi. He barely waved back… what a jerk face. Anyways yeah the circle at the top is where I work. The circle in the bottom left is where they practice (the toyota center) and the one in the middle is the Subway Kobe was at today.

=D

I failed

United States

In the United States, Las Vegas^[1], South Beach (Miami), Chicago and New Orleans are popular bachelor party destinations; they are also popular wedding locations. Increasingly, “destination bachelor parties” are replacing standard nights out, with Americans traveling to Montreal or Mexico.^[2]

Bachelor parties in the US often entail the mass consumption of alcohol, the hiring of a stripper or prostitute, and general rowdiness toward which the bride might not have a positive reaction (especially since women are not supposed to be among the invitees). Increasingly, bachelor parties have come to symbolize the last time when the groom is truly “free” and without the influence of his new wife.

Is this a preview of things to come?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?